The saying "Time heals the wounds" is widely accepted. In my opinion, allowing ourselves ample time to navigate through our pain is crucial, but it is equally important to proactively engage in the healing process and trust it. The outcomes rely on our active participation.

I remember a few years ago, one of my friends had just lost her mother and asked me, "How long did it take you to reduce the pain when you lost your mom?" She wanted a precise time frame like 2 months or 2 years. She was in so much pain that she just wanted it to go away. So, I told her my story.

After the passing of my mother several years ago, something surprising happened to me. Despite being in good physical health with no underlying lung conditions, I found myself struggling to breathe properly. I was catching my breath all the time and felt constriction in my lungs. Why couldn’t I breathe normally? 

I went to ask my mentor, "Sophie," she said, "did you know that grief often resides within our lungs?" While this knowledge wasn't new to me, in my haste to evade the reality of this new phase in my life, I chose to bypass it. I suppressed my emotions, put on a facade of strength, and pretended that everything was alright. Confronting the loss of my identity as a daughter to a mother meant acknowledging the absence of qualities like confidence, support, shared laughter, and meaningful conversations about life.

When I returned home, I was determined to take action, refusing to rely on the passage of time to heal my wounds. 

I took proactive steps to navigate through my grief. Seeking the assistance of an energy healer, I aimed to alleviate the constriction residing within my lungs. In addition, I practiced meditation, breathwork, journaling, and talked with trusted friends to express my emotions. Within a matter of weeks, a profound transformation occurred within me. I processed my pain, confronted my deepest fears, and emerged as a stronger individual. I began to embrace my role as my mother's daughter with a sense of pride, devoid of the previous burden of anguish. Thinking of my mother now evoked love and tranquility, rather than the intense pain I had once experienced.

Finally, I confided in my friend that there is no time frame for processing grief, but action is required to confront pain and start the healing process.

Emotional pain possesses an energetic quality that flows when we acknowledge and release it. Picture a scenario where a passerby on the street offers you a smile. You notice it, reciprocate with a smile of your own, and allow the moment to pass. Similarly, if someone passes by and casts a disapproving expression your way, you can choose to notice it and let it go. However, it is often our ego that intervenes, asking questions like, "What did I do to deserve that? What a rude person!" This internal dialogue traps the energy within our minds and bodies unless we consciously release it. 

Holding onto painful emotions obstructs the natural flow of energy, leading to physical discomfort or even illness (as in my case, where I struggled to breathe), emotional distress such as sadness or loneliness, and mental anguish like feeling lost or experiencing depression.

Fortunately, we possess the power to release these blocked energies within us. Once we take action and wholeheartedly trust in the process, our healing journey commences. 

Consequently, we can trust in our capacity to process and heal. The timeframe, however, depends on our level of engagement in the journey. As we courageously confront our fears and pain, we inevitably grow, and that growth itself constitutes healing.

So, how do we navigate this transformative process and foster trust within ourselves? The answer is love!

Love does not disapear when we encounter loss or life transitions such as divorce, relocation, job loss, the end of a friendship, or transitioning to an empty nest. 

Love persists within us, extending to ourselves, others, and the vast universe. We also are recipients of love from within, from others, and from the universe itself.

It is through self-love, action, and faith in the process, that true healing emerges.